Indelible Marks

A Basket filled with Excuses….

March 21, 2008 on 1:00 pm | In Books, God-factor, Motivation, Self Development |

I stumbled on this quote a few years ago and it stuck….”person wey no want do something go get one excuse or another why him no want do am” (or sumn like that). Anyways this is the pidgin version, if it doesn’t werk for you, you fit translate am to English. In fact am doing this post in pidgin English, so read on or get a translator. lol

An excuse is a reason or explanation, not necessarily true, given in order to make something appear more acceptable. An excuse is a false reason that enables somebody to do something he or she wants to do or avoid something he or she does not want to do. GBAM!

When it comes to this issue of excuses and the technical know-how of fabricating them, we are subject matter experts, yes, me and you inclusive. I mean we continually top our best excuse. We are gooood! What is your best coined excuse so far? I mean an excuse you give yourself and others for not attempting anything, for not stretching yourself, for giving up, for not being a success, for not making impact in life, for generally not doing what you ought to do, or for not being who you were meant to be.

We have used excuses such as

• our lack of connections. Go after your connections…one day, I’ll share the story of how I “met” Tony Elumelu, meet people, join a group or network.

• feelings of inferiority. It’s in your mind that you stay limited (Sasha-P!), get over it already. Don’t be afraid or feel inferior..a friend once told me that his friend says he can’t join facebook because it’s for people who have either achieved, school or work abroad etc.

• humble background. God doesn’t consult your past to confirm your future, set yourself free. Everyone was born humble…how humble does it get ..to land on earth in one’s birthday suit! lol. Who have you ever seen or heard was born with silver or gold or wooden spoon in mouth?

• not-so-good grades. I know our school teachers didn’t help us by the way we were graded but so what? School drop-outs are achieving great things.

• physical disabilities or handicap. Have you never heard of people achieving great things inspite of handicaps? I can’t even begin to list. Some of us need to close our eyes and open our hearts

• not enough money. Lack of money is not the issue, its lack of great ideas and guts. Every big business started small. Start with what you have (it’s the title of one of Sam Adeyemi’s books, read it)

• no godfather. We still want a human godfather when we have God the father on our side and all his angelic hosts at our beckon, but alas none beckons! who have you even approached?

• fear of rejection. This could be previous or futuristic. We hate to hear the word No, isnt it better to factor the possibility of receiving as many Nos as possible into the equation and get-a-moving. Sometimes we beat ourselves thinking the world will also beat us.

• fear of failure. In your previous attempt or someone else’s, or your conjured failure that you “believe” will happen when you make the attempt. Worry is the first cousin of fear and before long, their 2^nd cousin, high blood pressure has a way of showing up.

• no time. I think this is the most worn out excuse of all time. We seem to have time for everything else except the things that really matter to us and to our destiny. People world over are juggling several balls in this basket of life. I remember when i was working full time in banking operations, writing my professional exams (ICAN) and undergoing a full-time (MBA) course @ Unilag, it was extremely stressful but there were so many other people combining much more.

• negative words/lack of encouragement. We are negatively affected by what somebody said about us (malicious statements, backbiting or gossip) or what somebody said to us (discouraging advice, lagbaja did it and failed or tamedun tried it and got his fingers burnt). Pat yourself on the back and keep keeping on mate! Use it as a stepping stone. Prove your critics wrong.

I find myself often remembering this conversation I had with a number of people sometime back. I discovered my flair for beads a couple of years ago. It started with admiring it on other people….then I thought to myself… I can stimulate my creative juices and try my hands on this handcraft of making beads.

Before then, I don’t remember being into any handcraft as a hobby (except you want me to include the arts class or the music class from way back in high school which was compulsory lol), my brother used to paint and draw and he is very much into music, he sings and now does top-notch video production for a lot of Naija artists as a means of livelihood (inspite of discouragement and disapproval)

I met Seun and discovered she was into beadmaking. I identified a Saturday and fixed a date for my first 2 hour-class, maybe I should add that it was not a free-of-charge class o (perhaps I might have been lax if it was free). I gave her money to buy my tools and the beads that I would need for the session.

Usually, my weekends are for resting cos I would have maxed myself out during the week at work. I was intent on picking up this skill so I gave that up, resting, i mean. By the end of my first session, I was able to pick up the basic skills needed…the rest was for me to bring in my creativity in terms of the designing. Before I could say Jack Robinson….i was churning out beads after beads and as I adorned myself with them, I started getting positive feedback and compliments to which when I replied “I made them”, people will exclaim, “Where did u find the time?”

My next response would be “when you don’t want to do something, that’s when you don’t find the time”. My point exactly. Sometimes, as soon as I got home from work (and I work late), freshen up, I bring out my bead-box and work late into the night, stopping only I’m through. As orders started rolling in, Bead making became an integral part of my weekends. I would be holed up in my room for hours only to come out to show off my finished products. I had to do a couple of them all over for one reason or the other but i didnt give up.

My take is that, it’s double talk when we say we don’t have time to do something. If we care to be sincere, what we really mean to say is that we don’t want to do that thing. We have checked our interests against our limited time resource and made the choice of what to do and not to do. Granted that one can’t do everything in one day, but I am talking about over time. I am talking about what we keep putting off from one day to the other, fielding this same excuse. I will do it tomorrow and tomorrow is so wise…it never comes. Today is the Tomorrow you referred to Yesterday.

The pity party is officially over! Your best excuse has just been exposed so there’s nowhere to hide.

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